"Lollipop," Lil' Wayne

"They ask me why I wear shades at night...'cause I don't wanna see nothing."

The first sign Lil’ Wayne’s new single, “Lollipop,” would disappoint was where I first learned of it—not on his MySpace page, not from an “accidental” leak on the internet, but rather, on the “top five” list on my iTunes. The next sign was his voice, which was singing. To a tune. Whose idea was it to replace his usual froglike croak, suspended in perpetual giggle, with what sounded like Akon? And the third sign was the title—candy as a sexual metaphor? I think I’ve heard that one before. But I had faith in the rapper’s ability to turn trite topics hilarious and original with his unrivaled head for metaphor and tongue for wordplay. After all, this is the guy who calls himself “Kevin Federline” in his love for the “crazy bitch” of the rap game, and describes a woman giving him oral pleasure as “getting straight to the head like Excedrin.” Well, I waited and waited for five minutes and two seconds, and the only line that sounded anywhere near Li’l Wayne-ian was “so I let her lick the (w)rapper”—and I’m not even sure he gets the double entendre. Like the “ho’s” in “Earthquake” from Lil’ Wayne’s 2004 album “Tha Carter,” I want to wake up with Weezy F. Baby (Lil’ Wayne’s alias)--not some studio pawn who brags about bottle service.

Purchase “Lollipop” from puretracks:
http://www.puretracks.com/catalog/details.aspx?pid=umg_00602517676411

New York Times review of recent Lil’ Wayne concert: http://www.nytimes.com/2008/02/26/arts/music/26wayn.html?_r=1&oref=slogin